BEHOLD THE PREMIER KITCHENETTES!
It is justifiable to assert that the fact that this is University of Ibadan, the ‘premier’ university in Nigeria, presupposes the excellence and superiority of the various units that exist in the institution. Even though students of Logic may be quick to fulminate – ‘FALLACY OF DIVISION!’ we will only be deceiving ourselves to suggest that there is nothing wrong in this great (or if you like, first and best) university housing establishments that are unbefitting and, in fact, highly shameful. There are many evidential pieces that indicate that this institution may not be so great after all from the water and electricity supply to the poor accommodation and internet services that the university stakeholders have to succumb to. But then, it is only appropriate that more attention is focussed on a sector with a still fresh scar of desolation …
All, except the latest intakes maybe, will no doubt still be able to recall a time in the previous session when the capable heads in the university management thought it worthwhile to ban the rampant student-practice of cooking inside rooms. They argued that this is in their best interest. They said it is so that incidents of fire outbreak may be curbed. It was also circuitously declared that all those who cannot afford the costly cafeteria meals should find their way to Hades. However, as the loving fathers and mothers they have always been, they decided to mitigate the resultant harshness of the alien policy by establishing what they called ‘kitchenettes’.
These kitchenettes were established in all the halls of residence, in all blocks of dwelling, at least one for every floor. Many rooms, regardless of historical standing, were affected by the transformation agendas they were forcibly converted into cooking boxes. Workers came day-in day-out to work on the project. Books and other students’ properties found in these rooms were thrown out, the rooms were re-structured, blocks were arranged and cemented, planks were fixed where necessary and paint was applied to give a grandiose look. Water-pipes [and electric wires] were run too, even though they are, till today, virtually useless. And not to forget, new doors were placed in the entrances, doors which allegedly cost beyond the reach of the average bourgeoisie. Finally, they were equipped with double-faced hot plates which served the alimentary needs of UItes. But for how long did they?
Today, what used to be a jewel, a mecca and a thing of pride, has transmogrified into an eyesore, an abandoned affair, in fact, a thing of ridicule. There are lots of issues with the kitchenettes which are pertinent for the school authority to address with urgency. The king of these is the retirement of many of the hot plates. They have since retired from duty out of frustration.
At first, it started as a small problem in the form of partial blindness whereby one of the faces would seek not to function further. But now, what we see is a case of mass protest. The few students, rich enough to acquire personal cookers are forced to share them with several others, and then those too inevitably give up work after some weeks. We have those who have acquired up to three personal cookers after the said retirement due to the innate survival instinct of man and the struggle for food by any means possible.
Now that the hot plates have become redundant and students are unable to cook most of the time, this situation coupled with the fact that some rooms are not well electrified, has led to students using the kitchenettes as laundries, a place for pressing clothes. As a matter of fact, some also resort to converting these special rooms to places for charging appliances. Unfortunately however, this final and desperate attempt to ensure that the kitchenettes (if they can still be labelled as such) are not totally useless has also been frustrated by the ruin of the sockets. Cases abound where students have to carry their personal cookers to other floors just to get energy to run them.
It is only reasonable that the school authority made plans, from the beginning, for the periodic replacement and sustenance of the hot plates. But, this is way more than a year after the project’s inception, and several months into sessional resumption, yet no action or even communication of an intended action has been done. Is it that they in the corners of power have forgotten us so soon? Or might culpability actually lie with the student representatives who, probably because of their independence from cooking, fail to inform the appropriate quarters of the students’ needs?
Whatever is the cause of this abyss, we cannot afford to waste time further. Someone somewhere should wake up to his responsibility and ensure that somehow something sound and drastic is done to arrest the situation.
What we ask for is not just a replacement of the cooking implements but an enabling of the water-pipe-network and a constant check of the situation of the cooking rooms for necessary interventions. Or else, the millions of naira that were expended in the elaborate project would go down the drain, and our kitchens will forever remain a souvenir of premier ineptitude.
