YAM, PEPPER, SCATTER, SCATTER (Part 1)

“Pride and Precedent cannot overshadow reason” – Dan Brown, Angels and Demons
“Religion is not the opium of the masses, quietness is” – Anonymous
“This is a bad time to be a student…” – Ajatontiriajabale

uintellection

“Greatest of the Greatest Uites!”
That was the aluta salutation that opened the floor of the most attended UI students’ congress in recent times. Though I do have my reservation about the potency of congress in mapping administrative strategies and reaching sound conclusions because of its rowdiness and lack of organisation. I believe more in representative congress where various leader-representatives meet with their people and they in turn meet to synchronise the larger congress’ thoughts and concerns in a smaller and more organised representative gathering. This is what some people will refer to as “stakeholder meeting” and its advantages are far more than the former, principal of which provides a better reception for critical thinking and effective warring strategies because of its volume. While I hold this reservation, it would still be unjust not to recognise the magical success of the Congress and “flash protest” of 5th March. Fairness demand that I give kudos to the soul of our Union, Olateju Aliyu Oladimeji, aka Ah Speaker and the spirit of our Strength, Toheeb Arogundade, the speaker of the 5th Assembly; together with other faculty presidents and hall chairpersons, they have succeeded in safeguarding our dignity and our common voice. But beyond these praises lie trials that the goodwill enjoyed on the 5th of March may not rescue us from, if we don’t change our strategies and tactics of fighting this battle. Part me to delay this sermon to the later part of this discourse.

Despite the management’s intimidating scheme of inviting our lecturers to cajole us at the war front, the flash protest held and the students’ decision was upheld by the court of struggle. Glory be to God.

Later yesterday afternoon, I received a phone call from the SRC Speaker that the management has scheduled a meeting with the students’ leaders that day! Who does that? Who gives less than 10 hours notification for such an important meeting? But because, this is our struggle – our war, we couldn’t just let the enemies have a walk over, not when we are still alive. Despite the fact that we were not in our best form, we honoured the invitation. The 19-man management ‘s devisal was to invite just six of the students’ leaders and coerced them to submission by a panel of hungry wolves but as Dan Brown has rightly noted, pride, no matter how devious cannot overshadow reason. Other faculty presidents, hall chairpersons and campus journalists including myself later joined them at the meeting that took place at the VC’s lodge. I wanted to look at the time the meeting started but my phone was off, NO LIGHT!

We did a quick introduction but of course, the management representatives were obviously too arrogant to introduce themselves but we know them, even under the thickest cover of the night, we know the faces of the saboteurs!

The gallant Students’ Union President opened the meeting and the agenda was definite:

1. The state of power supply
2. The state of UI Bread and water
3. A.O.B

Unknown to us that the A.O.B will later be our Achilles heel but we still survived all the same.

The Directors of UI ventures (The producer of the famous UI bread)and UI Water were still on their way and that was when we moved to the A.O.B. which came to be our Achilles heel as we ended up discussing general items that ought not to have been discussed, that was the opportunity they needed to lash back at us. But as I stated earlier, we survived it and it even gave us the opportunity to see the minds of those who are steering the ship of the Ivory Tower.

The SU President moved on to discuss the state of Halls of Residence. He talked about the state of power supply on campus and lamented about why the whole Premier University, a university older than the nation itself cannot even generate its own power. At this point, a good number of them nodded their heads in approval but you can easily read through their minds that the nods were mere hypocritical. For the past decades, UI with all its roll of honours is still “planning” on how to generate power for itself. He talked about the Manual course registration, the state of the toilets, bathrooms and the Vice President talked about the state of the kitchenettes. It was at this point, someone asked us to make distinction as to the one we were referring to, the electrical system or the plumbing works as if any of the two is better, trust us, the chorus was in unison, “Everything!”. The Faculty of Education President later talked about their state of LLT and how it’s just too small to accommodate the numerical strength of its users.

Responding to these questions, our amiable VC said and I quote, “There’s no free lunch anywhere, you can’t pay 14,000 naira and expect the best…after all even St. Annes pay more than 100,000 naira”. That was when we knew VC’s daughter even stays in St. Annes as the ghettos of Idia, Queens and Awo are obviously not adequate enough for such royalty. It will be recalled that the former Dean of Students, Prof. Alada, who coincidentally was at the meeting also once said in an interview with UCJ that his wards “cannot stay in the halls of residence” This is the reality, the dog knows how to nurture her puppies, the dog knows how to prey on the grasscutter’s. He gave so many examples of privately owned hostels in Unilorin and other places, he talked about how the students there were paying through their noses for the quality they enjoyed, how those hostels are being run by those people and he asked “Why is it my problem to be looking for tissue paper for someone somewhere”. Our sagacious VC asked, “if someone gives you a brand new car and you are not working, how do you maintain it?” (This is the second time I’ll be faced with that question, I will answer it later.) He then ended on a humorous note, “For the past two weeks, there has not been power supply to the VC’s lodge, I should have joined you when you were protesting…” We all laughed because we knew it wasn’t FUNNY.

Then, the DVC admin, His Excellency, Prof. Aiyelari gave us what he thought to be a punch below the belt. He asked us if the reading rooms are now in good condition as they were in excellent state during their days, so he thought were on an expedition for misplaced priorities, he said that is what we should be asking because that is what really concerned our education. Then, I asked myself, what is the essence of a first class reading room without electricity? I don’t want to comment on that because he obviously made a fallacy in what the logicians will refer to as “argumentum non sequitur”. All Uites will agree with me that this is a very poor punch from a whole professor!

He gave us a lengthy lecture on how they purchase chemicals worth 5 million naira to purify water after getting the water free from Awba Dam and how they will pay the government in their new plans of getting water from Akinyele. His excellency also said and I want everyone reading this to pay a very big attention because we will refer back to it, “We are not an Island, we also rely on IBEDC…our cables are old, they don’t have the capacity to carry…it is what they give us that we distribute…” He also revealed that the University management pays not less than 30 million naira per month for IBEDC (Please take note of this too). He told us there is electricity, cleaning and refuse collection, “that is what we are charging for” (are you confused too?)

When the students questioned the rationality of admitting more than the system can contain they gave us a very nice explanation: 23,000 candidates logged in to UI portal, 21,000 candidates wrote the post-UME, 9,000 scored 50% and above and they told us that in the interest of fairness and justice, because they don’t want to kill the dreams of our younger brothers and sisters at home, because they don’t want them roaming the streets, they have decided to admit 4,000 of them to join us in this sweet paradise of suffering, how merciful?!

They told us about the generating plant that consumes 250 litres of diesel per hour. They told us about how UI operates four of this plant, they told us even if these plants operate on water, it couldn’t have been free still. They told us about the beautiful dream of the Ajibode solar village. They told us we lacked information, they asked us, “If you’re a VC, is that fair?” We looked on in silence, because we knew, even, that question is not fair…

It was time for the UI bread tale. The director told us not to look at the face and say it is not good. He said that when even SON has rated it as one of the best, who are we? Who are we, bloody UITES to say that it is not. He revealed that 90% of the bread is consumed before production. They told us about the founding vision of UI bread which is not to make profit but to provide a nutritional bread for all UITES. He challenged us to be more scientific. Our able Vice President stood her ground that this bread has bromate, the food technologists amongst us argued brilliantly, but we seem to not be winning battle for the soul of UI bread. He seemed to reason with us and later he spoke about their new site and the dream of a new UI bread, the one that will be produced by a 95% automated process and then he concluded, “If you will be patient for a week, you will see another UI bread”.

And then they gave us the old tale about how the University is run by 250 million naira subsidy annually. This is where the great Zik Lion attempted to calculate how much really is the school getting from the students and he demanded for a break down of that money, it took the grace of our Lord for him to finish with that question as our fathers were ready to serve his head as dinner that night. The Director for UI water came in with the battle for the spirit of UI water. He was an aluta person, he told us how he enjoyed the criticism as it is needed for progress. He said UI water has no chlorine, our Vice President countered him. We talked about prices and he tutored us about how distributors make even more profit than UI water itself. He told us that it is our responsibility to make sure that we cautioned the selfish traders who sell the waters for outrageous prices. He told us about how the price of the nylon they used has risen almost 100% and yet they continue to produce because the vision is not to be commercial. But then, we insisted that the quality is not standard, he invites us to come and verify. And that was how our VC said even Coca-Cola is not perfect, after all, cockroach sometimes find their way to the bottom of these bottles. Then, someone breaks in that by all standard, with the present resources we are enjoying, UITES should pay not less than 59,700 naira per bed space…(well, it’s still less than 100,000 naira sha).

And here comes Demola Lewis, I don’t know in what capacity he attended the meeting but I think we learnt a lesson, the school always put their best soldiers forward. He started boboing us by commending our constructive criticisms. He even told the UI water and UI ventures directors that “we have to take their opinions seriously” referring to us. He gave a good inspiring talk about how we should be creative with our protests, he even cited the cacerolazos protest where demonstrators merely banged pots to protest the policies of President Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner’s government in Argentina. He charged us with the 21st century idea of protest when it was clear that our problem is that of the 18th/19th century. We nodded our heads in agreement because we knew he even knows that the only language they understand perfectly is the language of the traditional protest (they may understand other languages too, but definitely not perfectly). He also spoke for us in the need for competition with UI bread and water. He then got back at us that we should stop making unnecessary demands, he told us that if we wanted more we should be ready to pay for more. He criticized all UItes for demanding to see their father, the VC on the day of protest, he referred to it as “belittling the position of VC”. He finally crowned it with the usual threat of SDC, which he said we could have bagged like Ph.D grades as a result of our gross misconduct on the 5th of March. He spoke, sparked and spoken but then I still was not able to figure why he had to be in that meeting.

I spoke next, I commended the VC for being student-friendly because I once had the opportunity to hold that opinion, in fact, I think he’s more simple, innocent and sincere than the honourable minister, Daddy Adewole but I fear that these people that surrounds him may soon coached him to be the next Robert Mugabe, God forbid! I want the best for my VC. I spoke on the communication gap between the management and the students, must the student ask or protest about a bad situation before the school talks? That is administrative insensitivity. I advised for a better system at the DPC. I also made another arguments that if students had been on the board of directorship of these ventures and units, it will go a long way to show management’s sincerity and a good strategy to nip many of these conflicts in the bud. After it was noted, his excellency, Professor Aiyelari later retorted that there are some things students should not know and there’s no need for students to be on these boards since they are already on the welfare board and co as if I don’t know the difference between black board and smart boards, I nodded all the same because I knew I wasn’t convinced. I also spoke on the state of Wifi for students’ access, if the likes of ITeMs are now going online with electronic bulletin, a grand innovation to commemorate Olayinka’s ascension to the throne of the VC, if the VC has the good interest of implementing online registration policy, if you want us to be global students, if we now have to pay online with Remita and we still have to rely on empty hen for our data then we must really be deceiving ourselves. Every year, we pay 3,000 naira for portal access, by my calculation, that’s over 60 million naira! For which portal abeg? The one that cannot even boast of a security system as strong as that of www.nairaland.com, if the money is just for accessing the UI portal, I seriously think that this is a fraud, if it’s to provide internet access for us, we are yet to see it, in either case something is definitely not right! The Tedder Hall prison issue was also raised by Temmy Gista, noted as usual, till one day, when tedderites will find their balls and pull the gate down. And then, Mr. Demola Lewis will come and give us the rhetoric of being innovative with protests as if he’s deaf to all the civilized consultations all this while. Anyway, there’s God.

Our erudite VC also addressed the “priority” gaffe, he said, he didn’t mean to say that Students are his second priority, it’s just that when you have a twin, at least you can’t call both at the same time, he said, one has to come before the other, he added. He then, boboed us that without students, this University would have been as good as IITA or any other research centres. Make we no lie, when he said this, our head swell small but we knew deep down that it’s all kunu, thicker than bobo. Sir, I know I am your student but knowledge has no monopoly, not even in this 21st century of globalization, therefore you will permit me to just note this: Leadership Lessons, rule #1 – “Never try to prove smart to smart followers when you make a mistake, just take responsibility for it and move on, very simple! You don’t waste your icing on a rotten cake, what you do is to throw it away and bake a new one. We are not all perfect. If you should apologise for that mistake today, you will see no one will talk about it again tomorrow…

At this stage, you will agree with me that we have largely exhausted our time not discussing our priority, power outage! By the time we came back to our senses, time has gone, they were already hastening everything. From here, the discussion has no definite direction again, the representatives of the maintenance unit were too hostile and they don’t even want to listen to what we have to say. At a point, the main man at the maintenance shouted at us, “Go and check the bulletin, it is there, 10am to 2pm”, sir, we know about the bulletin but the bulletin is not reflecting the reality on ground. One said the plant will be on by 12 midnight to 3am or 4am another said 12 midnight to 6am, they were not even sure of anything. We quickly noted that it is not about the adequacy now, it’s about the certainty but still they are not promising everything. Everybody was speaking at the same time and the next thing I heard was, “This meeting is adjourned!”

I am sure even if you are Oshiomole or Madam BBOG, you would still think twice before protesting the next day. Professors have spoken to you and you still want to protest to Dugbe? Ha! OyO is your case ooo (In Rita Dominic Voice), omo olomo, Ah Speaker, he jejely re-strategize, “e ni koba mi”, lol. The management played the card very well, we gave us facts we couldn’t corroborate that night, they gave us figures we couldn’t dispute till the morning of the next day, they hammered us down psychologically and I am sure they were happy that they won. But, our fathers were not foolish when they say, moja mosa la n mon akinkanju… we left the meeting quietly, with our heads buried to the ground, we knew there wouldn’t be protest today but then, the students’ leaders are rest assured that what is after Offa town is far more than the Oje village. There are many things I still want to address but this is getting too long, I will have to debate those issues in the part two of this article.

I am Oredola Ibrahim Ajatontiriajabale , a product of this chaos.

PS. For the award winning mobilizers, I still want to know your numerical strength after the freshers have been deducted. Don’t deceive yourselves, Zik is still the home of struggle.

PSS. NASU, UI may demonstrate tomorrow, hiya!

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