After “jumping” from one relationship to another, I figured it was time to get serious, so I decided to write an epistle to my future husband. I sha have to marry someday nooni….I can see his picture in my head already, he’s definitely tall, dark and drop dead gorgeous, I can sense some rolling eyes and raised eyebrows right now; well! I’ve got only one thing to say…duhhh!. Ok, so let’s not wander off the point, because if care is not taken I might just get started on the wedding day itself. However, I, (though a hopeless romantic) know that there’s more to marriage than having a fabulous wedding.
Now, now, now, let’s slow down a bit, I am not ready for marriage yet, not by a long shot; but a girl can dream, right? Ok! Enough playing around, here goes my letter:
Dear Husby (Husband sounds too formal, right?),
I probably have not met you, or I might have. Perhaps you are one of the guys in the “friend zone” or the “brother zone” (don’t even get me started on those in the “brother zone, anyway, in your defense, I sure hope you are not). I’m sure you are an amazing guy (wouldn’t settle for less) and so, I need to meet you very soon because I’m getting to that stage where I’m beginning to have grey hairs (lol….don’t panic, I’m still in my prime) I really need to meet you right now not only because I don’t want you to waste time with any other girl but because I want us to start building our foundation together now.
As you would eventually get to know, I like talking…a lot…and of course there are some things you need to work on before I meet you.
I hope that you love God, because that’s number one priority. Numero Uno.
Please! Please! Please! Don’t like Amala, because I don’t know how to cook that stuff, Now, don’t get me wrong, I definitely and most certainly know how to cook; I mean I could whip up a nice bowl of Noodles and egg, Bread and Tea, Plantain and egg. However, if you insist on eating that black stuff, we could always go to an Amala joint, right? Yeah, I have no clue how to pound yam either. Thanks
Be Tall: I’m six feet tall and I love to wear heels so it’s very important to me that you are tall, if not please start eating beans from now on, I hear it works and I hope it does.
Be hard working, confident and NOT stingy. I love hardworking guys and trust me boo, I can’t stand it if you have a tight fist.
Like I said earlier, I’m hopelessly romantic, therefore, I would accept nothing less from my future MANY! Now when I say romantic, I mean, a guy who knows how to take care of me, you know like, cook for me, give me foot rubs, open car doors for me,…and so on, one more thing, honey, I really hope you know how to sing, my favorite songs are “Iyawo mi” by Timi dakolo and “I got you babe” by Cher, I wouldn’t mind if you can sing those songs for me on our wedding day.
Lest I forget! This is really important; I love laughing, I appreciate a man who has a functioning sense of humour.
I know it sounds like I have too many requirements, but trust me when I say that I’ll be able to meet your requirements too. I’m neither fat nor thin, I love football (which guy does not like a football fan) and I’m a Man United Fan (Red devil for life), I visit the Gym every day (tongue in cheek). I’m also very likeable, I’m certain your mum will like me; and your sisters too.
There are so many things I want to tell you, so many trips and holidays I want to spend with you, so come soon and take care of yourself for me, ok? It does not really matter who you have been with before you meet me, I’ll be waiting right here
N.B: Did you notice I have been calling you “Honey”? That’s my pet name for you, so get used to it.
Bye for now, Honey.
Yours-in-waiting,
Your future wifey.
