WHO AM I?

WHO AM I?

We all are familiar with riddles. They say something like:

“I do this. If I am this, I stay here; If I am that, I live there. Who am I?”

At that spot where you standing, you begin to search your brain for answers, you look up into the sky, you look around you, and you look inside of you. You search everywhere for the answer. But every now and then you come back to the riddle, and ask yourself the same question again. You are thrown into deep thinking. You begin to wonder and ask “what could it be?”

If you not the type to easily throw in the towel, you try hard as possible to unravel the identity of the thing in question. But first you know you must consider all information given before the question was asked, then you find options—possible answers— that fit into each information give perfectly.  An answer that doesn’t satisfy even just one condition is discarded. At the end of the day, it is either you found the right answer or not. If you have thought too much about it and you are scared to be wrong, you end up saying “I don’t know.”

One strange yet profound thing you should notice about riddles are when you give the wrong answer, you know it. Deep down you know you are wrong. Ever wondered how is it that I know that this answer is wrong when I don’t know the right answer? How can I be so convinced that I am wrong? It is because the answer is in you; you just haven’t found it out yet. When the right answer is finally given, you say something like: “ohh So it is this!”

The question of who you are is a deeper riddle. Unlike the normal type of riddle, it gives more than enough information that precedes the question of who you are. Your past and your present are that information such that you have to sieve and pick out the important ones. Again, unlike the normal riddle, you can’t afford to give up. Your happiness is attached to finding the answer. Each person has his own peculiar riddle to solve, and until you give the right answer, you will never be happy. No matter how long it takes.

But then again, I ask “who are you?”

I have struggled with this question for years, three years to be precise. And on each occasion I had not a clue. A few times I lie to myself to have found the answer, but deep down I know it is only a wrong answer to cover up my misery. In Alison Gopnik’s words, “young children seem to be learning who to share this toy with and figure out how it works, while adolescents seem to be exploring some very deep and profound questions: “How should this society work? How should relationships among people work?” the exploration is: “Who am I, what am I doing?”

WHAT SOME PSYCHOLOGISTS THINK.

Some Psychologists think that asking that question only makes you more miserable. It is true that people who ask this sort of question are typically struggling with their identity and are searching for a core sense of themselves. They say the irony is that the more you seek to identify who you are, the more fragile you are likely to feel about yourself.

But here is my argument. That something makes you more miserable doesn’t make it wrong or bad. You can ask gold, it is miserable all the time in fire. But once it is out, the rest is history.  People of immense greatness do not always feel comfortable blending in with the crowd. They stand out and ask deep questions founded on this one question of identity. For a long time, I thought I was running mad, because no one around be seemed to be concerned about the question. Everyone looked perfectly satisfied with themselves. Well most times, I just concluded they found their answer and are already working toward it. See, it is a perfectly good sign of greatness hidden within you if you constantly ask yourself this question. I ask; is it not better to admit you fragility and then seek ways to be strong?  How can you be right if you were never wrong?

They also argue that there is no plausible answer. For if there were any, then it only means we are a fixed thing. The answer to this question of Identity is never fixed, yes I agree. But in the process of trying to find answers to this question, the better you get at knowing who you really are. The problem lies in when you get frustrated with not finding answers early. I said it took me three years.

AVOIDING DEPRESSION.

It is however important that you do not get too engrossed with you search for answer that you grow depressed and sad. It is important to realize that it will take time to get an answer. While you searching for an answer; live a normal live. Our identity should be seen as an ongoing process. Rather than a static snapshot, we should embrace a flowing sense of self, whereby we are perpetually re-framing, re-organizing, re-thinking and re-considering ourselves. The only reason why we try to answer the question of who we are is to have a sense of direction, note our weakness that we can turn to strength and our strength that we can use on a whole new level

I am a lot more scared of people who don’t seem to be worried about this question. You can’t tell what next they are going to do. They don’t live life by principle, and they have no identity. A man’s life has no direction if the question of who he is does not constantly nag him. How can you know where you going to, when you clueless as to your destination and present location?

GETTING ANSWERS

How do you get answers? You start by consciously evaluating your actions. There are a few moments in life that your actions shows you who you are. Why did I act like this? Why didn’t I do it this other way? When you have just messed up or done something wrong. Take time to rewind the whole scene again, look at those areas where you could have done it better. It is important that you don not blame others. Nobody is responsible for the way you act, except you. If you don’t agree with me, don’t waste your time searching for answers. You will never find them because you are not honesty with yourself.

You can also get answers is to take personality test online. There are so many tests online. However, these tests are useless if you have a habit of lying to yourself. You answer questions as if you are already who you want you want to be, but not who you are presently. That is one big problem that undermines the effectiveness of personality test. Another way—the most effective and reliable way I know—is to pray to God to help you see who you really are right now. Remember, you don’t have to be a saint to pray.

 

 

                                                      Xpnonent

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